The Worst Games Of Other Game
Systems
In the article "The Games That Really
Ruined The Atari 2600", I focused solely on Atari's main contributions to the
American game market implosion of 1984 -- the 2600 Pac-Man that failed
to live up to gamers' expectations as far as home ports of arcade games were
concerned; the 2600 E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial game that tried to cash
in on a popular 1982 Steven Spielberg movie and bombed big time; and the 2600
Swordquest series that, in addition to its failure of bringing a
suitable Dungeons & Dragons-type successor series of games in the vein
of Adventure, also held a contest that never reached its
ultimate-playoff climax due to both the market implosion and the Tramiel
takeover of Atari. Yet the curse of really bad games for game systems
pretty much hangs over every game system ever produced. Some companies,
including Atari, that brought out game systems had nothing but a steady stream
of garbage games and rarely had any good ones, if ever some of them did.
Other game systems have the occasional "black sheep" kind of game among games
that were of better quality. Here in this article are just a few
examples of games that had such shameful reputations among those who bought
them:
1. Donkey Kong (Coleco/Intellivision) -- Prior to 1982, the
Intellivision's really big software-selling focus was on sports games; having
the best-looking, best-sounding, and overall best-playing versions of
baseball, football, basketball, soccer, hockey, and whatever kind of sport
they could emulate for the hard-core sports-playing fan. Although Mattel
didn't ignore the arcade-action category of games completely, for they had
also released Astrosmash, Space Armada, Space Hawk,
Star Strike, and Night Stalker, more people found that kind of
gaming on the Atari 2600 and found their games to be more enjoyable than their
Intellivision counterparts. Up until 1982, Mattel provided the bulk of
Intellivision's software support, but over time would also accrue third-party
developers such as Imagic, Activision, Coleco, and even their rival Atari that
would give their neglected arcade-action game category a boost in titles.
Coleco, in particular, had the boldest marketing strategy of supplying
gameware for the Atari 2600 and Intellivision in addition to their
newly-released ColecoVision, and one of their debut titles was a home
rendition of Nintendo's classic arcade game of 1981, Donkey Kong, for
all three systems.
While I personally champion the idea of
making versions of a popular game available for multiple game systems, one can
only wonder what happened with the Intellivision port of Donkey Kong
that made people suspect that Coleco had deliberately sabotaged the
programming of that version in order to make the ColecoVision version look
better (the same criticism which was also aimed at the 2600 version).
First of all, there are only two screens in this version -- the ramps and the
rivets -- and both of them look like the ColecoVision version's done using
those old honeycombed popsicle sticks that children could build little houses
and stuff from. Mario, his girlfriend, and Donkey Kong look worse than
they do on the 2600, almost to the point of being unrecognizable. The
sound effects were a weak imitation of the arcade original's that also
included music, and the game's controls were barely responsive enough to let
Mario climb up and down these screens and jump over the barrels and fireballs
that were hurled down at him by the crazy ape. Even having four skill
levels and a one- or two-player option added to this version wasn't enough to
exonerate this failure.
The really sad part about Coleco's
Donkey Kong for the Intellivision was that it had tainted people's view of
this third-party company, not just in the release of this game but also in the
release of other coin-op games such as Carnival, Venture,
Mousetrap, Ladybug, Zaxxon, and Donkey Kong Junior,
whose translations ranged from passable to mediocre. Interestingly,
Donkey Kong, Carnival, Venture, and Mousetrap were
rendered inoperable on the Intellivision II that Mattel released in 1982, so
if Coleco was considered guilty for allegedly sabotaging their non-ColecoVision
game releases in order to make their own system's games look better, Mattel
would share similar culpability in allegedly sabotaging Coleco's first release
of games.
2. Back To The Future (LJN/NES) --
When Nintendo revived the American market and interest in videogames in the
late 1980s, the company garnered enough help from third-party software
developers through its "quality assurance" licensing system that would, in
theory, prevent a repeat of the market implosion of the mid-1980s from the
uncontrolled glut of games (most of them bad) that customers and sellers got
swamped with. In practice, however, it didn't entirely stop bad games
from coming out by companies whose goal was to make good profits rather than
good games. LJN, a formerly independent toy company that became part of
Acclaim, started out in the NES game business with games based on popular
movies such as Jaws, Friday The 13th, Nightmare On Elm Street, Beetlejuice,
and The Karate Kid, with varying degrees of quality. However,
one particular specimen, an adaptation of Universal's 1985 sci-fi/comedy
Back To The Future, repeated the same sin that E.T. The
Extra-Terrestrial had committed on the Atari 2600 -- the sin of trying to
market a game based on a great movie that doesn't have anything that could be
adequately turned into a workable, let alone enjoyable, game experience.

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The resulting game of Back To The
Future had this as its plot: the player-character Marty McFly walked
through the neighborhoods of Hill Valley in 1955 avoiding giant bees, workmen,
bullies, and various other obstacles laid out in a manner similar to
Xevious and other sundry scrolling-shooter games, all in his quest to
reunite his future parents in 1955 and to get back to 1985. Marty is not only
working against a level clock that gives him bonus points at the completion of
the level, but also against a constantly fading picture of himself and his
siblings, and the only way he can keep them from completely fading out is to
pick up clocks that are strewn along the way. There are some locations
along the way that provide different types of mini-games that Marty must
complete in order to proceed further, such as throwing milkshakes at Biff Tannen and his goons at Lou's Cafe, blocking Loraine Baines' kisses at the
high school, catching musical notes with Marty's guitar at the dance, and
racing to the clock tower in Doc Brown's DeLorean time machine while dodging
lightning bolts. If this wasn't bad enough on the scale of lameness and
total incongruity with the movie, the game's difficulty level
made this movie adaptation even less enjoyable, and the annoying music that
played throughout the game didn't improve things that much.
Being one that bought LJN's combined
adaptation of the movie sequels, Back To The Future II & III, around
1990 for my birthday, I was treated to a game that made more sense as a movie
adaptation (Marty did more time-traveling in Back To The Future Part II
and Part III than he did in the original) and yet also came off as a
really long and not-quite-entertaining imitation of the Super Mario Bros.
games, even with creatures that looked like they were inspired from those
games. I didn't even try to get through the Part II section of the game
until I had a third-party game-cheating device called the Game Action Replay
on my NES to let me save my position in the game, and Part III looks like it
wasn't finished in time since it had mini-games like in the Part II section
that had some really difficult challenges that made me suspect that this
product had to go to market even after LJN originally scrapped the idea of
releasing it as Back To The Future Part II in order to fit the Part III
section in.
Probably the only good thing that happened
was that in time Acclaim had snapped up LJN and started releasing games for
the NES, Super NES, and Gameboy under both labels for a time until they
decided to drop the LJN label for good. Then again, Acclaim began to
acquire a nasty reputation for releasing really bad games, most of them being movie
and comic book adaptations, the first of such being the NES version of the
1990 sci-fi movie Total Recall with Arnold Schwarzenegger. At
this writing, Acclaim has declared bankruptcy and has closed down its various
worldwide offices after years of disappointing gamers who were constantly
allured by the company's advertising promises and then let down by constant
poor delivery.
3. Mortal Kombat (Acclaim/Super NES)
-- Competing against Capcom's Street Fighter II in the arcades was
Midway's own one-on-one fighting game which featured not only digitized actors
playing the various fighting characters in the game (a technique used
previously with Atari Games' Pit Fighter), but over-the-top blood spews
when certain hits are used and gruesome finishing moves better known as
"fatalities" that could be activated by entering in a controller
code at the right time when the player beats his opponent in two rounds.
The game's notoriety would also make Mortal Kombat a target for parent
groups who decry the increasingly-graphic visuals in all forms of
entertainment as a sign of American society's increasing downfall -- so much
so that it had affected the release of the game for home use on the Super NES
and Genesis systems.
Nintendo and Sega, the parent companies of
the respectively mentioned game systems, were of two different mindsets
concerning Acclaim releasing Mortal Kombat for their systems.
Nintendo had such a way with game companies to not only keep their Super NES
and Gameboy releases "family-friendly" and "kid-friendly", but also to keep
them as non-offensive as possible, which included the alteration of a graphic
still shot of a gravestone in Super Castlevania IV by removing a cross
that adorned it. With Mortal Kombat, the game was graphically
altered by not only replacing the blood spews with sweat, but also by altering
some of the character's finishing moves (the decapitation that Johnny Cage
would inflict upon his beaten opponent, for example, would be changed over
into a super-powerful kick that went straight through his opponent's body --
gruesome enough, but rather tame in comparison). While the Super NES
version admittedly looked better than its Genesis counterpart, Sega had won
over prospective buyers by allowing Acclaim to keep the blood and finishing
moves intact in its Genesis release -- yet in order to see this in all its
gory...I mean, glory...the player had to enter in a controller code at a
certain point in one of the game's introduction screens talking about "codes".
The same thing was also done with the Game Gear version of Mortal Kombat,
keeping the arcade-rich elements hidden and only accessible through a
controller code.
In the end, Nintendo realized its blunder
of forcing its Super NES Mortal Kombat to go without the popular arcade
elements when they received angry letters not only from game fans but from
parents who were seeing Nintendo setting itself up as censors doing the job
that parents and free-minded individuals could have done on the consumer
level. Ultimately, this and the diminished sales of the Super NES
version (the Gameboy version is bad enough to not make many mention of it in
this article) led Nintendo a year later to allow Acclaim to publish the arcade
sequel Mortal Kombat II for the Super NES with all its gruesome
elements intact, though it now came with a label that warned of such content
being in the game. With the Entertainment Software Ratings Board system
in place a year later, the issue of censoring out violent material became
moot.