Empath's personal journal.
It is now the fiftieth birthday of this smurf's daughter Psycheliana. This smurf is amazed at how she's growing into a young girl Smurf just like her mother, yet she's also taken after looking like her aunt Sassette back when she was her age. She's at the age where she can begin her training with her minds-eye abilities, but since there are no other Psyches in this village and Polaris Psyche has moved to Smurfette Island with his wife, it falls entirely upon this smurf to train her properly. This smurf doesn't know how good of a teacher that this smurf will be in this area of expertise, but the one thing this smurf will not do is send Psycheliana away to Psychelia in order to get the best training, even if the Psyches are the best teachers in telepathy and telekinesis. Smurfette seems to have faith that this smurf's knowledge will be sufficient enough for teaching Psycheliana, and that she may be able to learn new abilities that this smurf has not ever learned before. This smurf trusts in Smurfette enough to feel that she may be correct in judging this smurf's potential abilities as a teacher.
It was the evening of Psycheliana's 50th birthday party, and Papa Smurf was glad to see as many of his little Smurfs and their children gather around the X-shaped table in the village square to celebrate his granddaughter's birthday. Psycheliana herself was so excited that she couldn't wait to blow out the candles of her birthday cake that Greedy Smurf had baked for her, nor could she wait to open the presents that her fellow Smurflings gave her, including her closest friend Miracle.
By the time the party was over, Psycheliana walked home with her parents Empath and Smurfette when she thought of something to ask. "Mama Smurf, how does this smurf sense that you're younger than Papa Smurf?" she asked.
"Liana, you should never ask a female Smurf about her age, because it's just simply impolite," Empath said.
"That's okay, Empath," Smurfette said. "I don't mind that it's our daughter who's asking me how old I really am. It would be really impossible for me to hide the truth from her since she can smurf whatever it is that I'm thinking."
"I don't mean to pry, Mama Smurf, if that question makes you feel uncomfortable to answer," Psycheliana said. "I just can't help smurfing this feeling of sadness that you have about where it is that you smurfed from."
"It's something this smurf was hoping that you would ask a little later in life when your Mama Smurf feels that you're ready for it, Liana," Empath said.
"Well, I think that she's more than ready to know, Empath," Smurfette said. "When you get smurfed in your bed, Liana, I will smurf you everything you need to know about how I smurfed to be. Is that smurfy enough for you?"
"Sure, Mama Smurf, I'll smurf myself ready right now," Psycheliana said as soon as they reached the door to their house and went inside. Empath and Smurfette dropped their daughter's presents by the table near the door and watched as Psycheliana rushed to her bedroom to get herself ready for bed.
"Seeing Liana being this eager to smurf herself ready for bedtime is something this smurf wishes was part of this smurf's own life as a Smurfling, Smurfette," Empath said as they watched their child together.
"She does make me wish that her childhood was my own, Empath," Smurfette said. "I'm just glad that she gets to experience it as a female Smurf that I gave smurf to, and without having to be smurfed away from home like you were."
"Even with all the struggles we smurfed through together in raising our own child straight from diapers to this point in time, this smurf would say that it was all worth it, Smurfette," Empath said.
"We're not finished with that job yet, Empath," Smurfette said. "There's still 50 more years to smurf for her before she becomes an adult Smurf. When she finally smurfs off on her own, then we can say that it was all worth it."
"Let's try to remain optimistic about this, Smurfette," Empath said. "50 years for a Smurf is basically a landmark event that we should celebrate our abilities as parents. We made it this far and we haven't lost anything except control of our tempers once in a while."
"You sure you'd be ready to smurf another child into this world now that we know how to raise the one that we have, Empath?" Smurfette asked, looking straight into his eyes when she asked that.
Empath felt himself getting a little uneasy. "This smurf thinks that we should settle on making sure Liana becomes an adult Smurf first before we have any others," he answered.
Soon Psycheliana called out from her bedroom, "Okay, Mama, I'm all set with my jammies on."
"You want this smurf to be with you when you tell your story to Liana?" Empath asked Smurfette.
"I'll be fine smurfing this by myself, Empath," Smurfette said as she gave him a kiss. "You smurf yourself ready for bed and I'll join you when I'm finished."
"Yes, Mama Smurf," Empath said with a slight chuckle. Smurfette slapped him playfully in the behind and watched as he went off toward their bedroom to change into his night clothes.
Smurfette then went into her daughter's bedroom, seeing that she was already in bed waiting for her. "I'm ready to smurf your story about how you came to be, Mama Smurf," Psycheliana said.
Smurfette pulled up a chair and sat beside her daughter. "You see, Liana, there was this evil wizard named Gargamel who lived in the forest up to fifteen years before you were born."
"I know that he tried many times to capture the Smurfs, Mama Smurf, but why is it that he hated the Smurfs so much?" Psycheliana asked.
"Well, Liana, it was because Gargamel wanted to create the Philosopher's Stone, and to do that he needed a single Smurf...which turned out to be an error because what he really needed were six Smurfs," Smurfette said. "Anyway, Gargamel didn't like that the Smurfs were able to smurf into his house and free the captured Smurf that he had, and so he smurfed on a way to destroy them once and for all..."
As Psycheliana listened to her Mama Smurf's story, she saw in her mind the castle of the evil wizard Gargamel standing outside the Smurf Forest in the middle of the night with all the lights on as the wizard fussed and fumed, trying to keep his anger directed at the Smurfs in control for as much as he could while he was talking to his cat Azrael.
"This anger that I have toward the Smurfs vexes me, Azrael," Gargamel said. "'They're just harmless little blue creatures', I keep telling myself...and yet they have managed to sneak into my hovel without me knowing about it and watched me prepare the formula for creating the Philosopher's Stone, waited for the right moment to pounce on me, and what's worse, they mixed up my evil formulas so that I ended up shrinking myself to their size instead of being a giant. Ooooh, how I hate them so much that I want to destroy them...but the question is how."
Azrael just meowed a response of indifference, as if he couldn't care less about his master's predicament.
"Well, my lazy little feline, the past month of studying up on the Smurfs without them knowing about it has given me a little insight on how I can destroy those little blue wretches," Gargamel said. "According to the book of legendary creatures of the forest, Smurfs are supposed to be a group of male and female beings...and yet from what I have seen of them, there isn't even a single female among the generation that wears white clothes. That means that if they don't have a female Smurf, they can't create another generation of those happy little blue pests."
Azrael perked his ears when he heard that and meowed something that sounded like, "No females?"
"That's right, my brown furball, no female Smurfs," Gargamel said. "Oh, I could wait and see what they will do if they didn't have any females that they could create another generation with. But then I was thinking, 'why bother waiting when you can create something that will hasten their destruction', and that was when inspiration finally hit me: I will make something for the Smurfs that will hasten their destruction in the most interesting way, and through the weakest part of their little blue bodies -- their little blue hearts. This creation through a spell that I have found in one of my books will have all the alluring charm that I will need to make the Smurfs fall for her like insects being lured into a spider's web."
Azrael watched as Gargamel gathered up things in his laboratory for the project that he was about to work on, curious to see its end result.
"With this handful of blue clay that I found in a swamp, and these ingredients for a spell that would bring inanimate material to life, I shall bring forth the very instrument of the Smurfs' downfall -- the Smurfette," Gargamel said, as he gathered the ingredients together and mixed them in his cauldron. "Crocodile tears, nightshade, wormwood, hemlock, bloodroot, poison ivy, moonseed, black hellebore, sugar, cinnamon, thorns of a rose, and a stone for a heart."
He then immersed the sculpted form of a female Smurf into the mixture and recited the following words:
Wrath of the wind, Cry of the blue,
Howl of the Wolf where there isn't a moon,
Magical Mixture, Magical Spell,
Bring life to this creature at the sound of this bell.
As the spell he cast on the sculpted form took effect, she rose from the cauldron, opened her eyes, and saw her evil creator for the first time, smiling a very wicked smile.
"I am yours to do with as you command, Master Gargamel," the form spoke. "But first of all, who and what am I?"
Gargamel laughed evilly. "Why, I am your father, and you are my daughter, my little Smurfette," he replied. "You have been brought into this world for the most dastardly deed that can ever be done...to destroy the Smurfs!"
"Smurfs? What do these Smurf even look like, Master?" Smurfette asked, realizing who she now was.
"Oh, the Smurfs are sweetest creatures you'll ever find in the forest...so sweet that they will make you sick!" Gargamel described emphatically. "They look like little men in blue skin, they wear only a hat and pants, and they live all alone without a female to be their companion. That's where you come in."
"And what's my job going to be?" Smurfette asked, curious to know what these Smurfs are.
"You're going to be the answer to their dreams, the angel that's come to rescue them from their dreary lives of happiness," Gargamel answered. "You're going to use what you've got to get the Smurfs falling for you, and then together you and me are going to destroy them, as father and daughter."
"Father and daughter," Smurfette mused, thinking she could use this to her advantage. "Well, what are you waiting for? I'm more than ready to help you destroy these Smurfs, whatever they look like!"
"It worked!" Gargamel exclaimed, very excited about his new creation. "I have finally brought life to the very thing that would bring doom to those wretched blue beings! She will lure them through their hearts to their own destruction!"
A day later, Papa Smurf sent a group of Smurfs out to work on the bridge over the River Smurf. Handy, Hefty, and Duncan joined the group and worked as hard as they could to get as much work done before lunchtime.
"I'll be glad when the day's over, laddies," Duncan said as he was carrying some logs over to be placed on the bridge and hammered in. "Another day of work and this bridge will be good as smurf."
"So you planning on smurfing over with us to Tapper's Tavern after dinner, Hefty?" Handy asked.
"Naaah, it's just the same old thing night after night, Handy," Hefty said. "Besides, you know that I can't drink sarsaparilla ale, even as much as I would want to drink Gutsy under the table."
"That's why I'll always smurf up on top of you, laddie," Duncan said. "You've got to have the constitution of a McSmurf if you're going to smurf a chance of outsmurfing me with a keg full of ale."
"You want to ruin your health, Gutsy, that's your smurfness," Hefty said. "Me, I'll be fine by myself smurfing a few exercises before bed to smurf me in shape for the following morning."
"Why not just smurf by for a glass of tomato juice before you smurf off and do your exercises, Hefty?" Handy asked.
"Maybe I will, Handy, but unless there's something smurfing on at the tavern that's going to be different, you won't see me smurfing away my nights in it like the rest of you," Hefty said.
"Well, suit yourself there, laddie," Duncan said. "You might as well go smurf the other side of the bridge and see how the work is smurfing."
"I'm already on it," Hefty said as he made his way across the unfinished structure to the other side of the bridge. That was when he heard the faint sound of someone crying. "Hey, what is that?" he asked.
"I don't know, Hefty," a Smurf said as he stopped to listen to whatever it was that Hefty was hearing. "Maybe Weepy's smurfed off into the forest to cry or something."
"I'll go and smurf to see who it is," Hefty said as he headed into the forest toward the sound of the crying.
He didn't go far to find out, for just beyond the other side of the bridge, a little beyond where anybody could see, Hefty found a blue-skinned female by herself, sitting with her head buried. "I'm so lost, so lonely, and so frightened," she sobbed.
"Is there anything I can smurf you with?" he asked politely.
The female raised her head and saw that it was a Smurf asking her. "Oh, you startled me," the female said.
"Sorry about that," Hefty said. "I was just hearing somebody crying out here in the forest and came to smurf who it was, that's all."
"I was lost in the forest on my way to the Smurf Village. I was wondering if you could smurf me the way!" she said, wiping away her tears.
Hefty wasn't sure he knew her well enough to offer any help yet. But he did feel his heart going out to her. "You mean...that you're a Smurf?" he asked. "I've never smurfed the likes of you before!"
The female laughed at him, though not insultingly. "No, you silly, I'm a Smurfette!" she answered. "Don't you know what a Smurfette looks like?"
Hefty looked at her a bit increduously. "You mean...you're a female Smurf?"
"Well, what else would I be?" Smurfette said, batting her eyes. "Don't you like what you see?"
Hefty wasn't sure of what to say, as he was feeling some sort of attraction towards her. "Uh, gee, I don't know."
"Oh, I promise that you will," Smurfette said.
Hefty found himself staring at her before he realized he needed to do or say something. "Look, me and my fellow Smurfs are heading back to the village soon," Hefty said. "You can follow us home and talk to Papa Smurf about smurfing there!"
Hefty started to walk away to lead the Smurfette toward the village when she called out, "Wait a minute...aren't you going to smurf me up?"
Hefty stopped, wondering what to do. And then he went back over and pulled her up by the hand onto her feet. She was so startled by his strength and sudden swiftness, she nearly fell into Hefty's arms.
"Well, you sure know how to smurf a girl onto her feet!" she managed to say, a bit embarrassed.
Back at the bridge, Handy and Duncan noticed that Hefty didn't come back alone. "Say, who's the frizzy-haired lassie that Hefty just smurfed back here with?" Duncan wondered.
"I don't know, Duncan," Handy said. "I don't think that I have ever smurfed the likes of her before."
The other Smurfs also stopped what they were doing to see the female Smurf that was with Hefty. "Oooh, I've never seen so many boy Smurfs before...so brave, so strong, and so handsome," Smurfette said.
"There are some stones that we can smurf across the river on to smurf to the other side, Smurfette," Hefty offered as he began to jump down into the gulley.
"Hey, wait a minute," Smurfette said, stopping him from going any further. "Aren't you going to carry me across the river like a real gentlesmurf?"
Hefty looked at her, wondering what he was going to do. And then he hopped back up, slung Smurfette over his shoulder, and hopped across the river carrying her.
"Say, laddie, that's not the proper way to be smurfing a lassie around anywhere," Duncan said after Hefty and Smurfette made it to the other side and Hefty put her back on her feet.
"And where did that female Smurf come from, anyway?" Handy asked.
"I didn't ask her, and she didn't tell me, Handy," Hefty said. "I was going to bring her to Papa Smurf so that she could explain it herself."
"Oh, this Smurf is so cute with the sideburns on his face," Smurfette said, looking at Duncan. "What's your name?"
Duncan found himself staring at Smurfette before he answered her. "Oh, uh, the name is Duncan McSmurf, lassie, which is what I prefer to be called. And you are...?"
"Oh, you can just call me Smurfette," she answered.
"And you can call me anytime, Smurfette," Handy said, also finding himself just staring at Smurfette. "I mean, you can call me Handy."
Smurfette giggled. "I bet that you must be really handy with your tools, huh?"
Hefty noticed that the other Smurfs have stopped working altogether and just stared at Smurfette. "Well, what are you all smurfing at?" Hefty said. "Haven't any of you seen a female Smurf before?"
"Honestly, Hefty, it's been a long time since we have last seen a female Smurf," one of the other Smurfs said.
"Yeah, it's making us wonder what a female Smurf even looks like," another Smurf said, with several other Smurfs agreeing with him.
"Well, let's get ourselves back to smurfing our work right this minute," Handy said to the other Smurfs. He then turned to Hefty and said, "Maybe it would be better to bring Smurfette to the village right now, just so that we don't get distracted from our work."
"I'd be happy to escort the pretty raven-haired lassie to the village," Duncan offered.
"I smurfed her out in the forest, Gutsy, so I might as well be the one who will be her escort," Hefty said.
Duncan snorted. "Very well, but don't you be forgetting that my name is Duncan, laddie."
As Smurfette followed Hefty on his way back to the village, Smurfette asked Hefty, "I wonder why you have those hearts smurfed on your big strong arms."
"Oh, they're just my tattoos, Smurfette," Hefty said. "You know, I wear them because I like to show that I am a big and strong Smurf. By the way, you act as if you have never seen a male Smurf before. I guess I'm wondering why."
"That's something that I can't explain, Hefty," Smurfette said. "But I'm sure that a big strong Smurf like you wouldn't mind having me smurf around the village, would you?"
"Uh, of course not, Smurfette," Hefty said. "I'm sure you'll find something useful in the village to occupy your time with."
Smurfette looked sideways out toward the forest with a slight smirk. "I'm very sure that I will, Hefty."